Chapter 1: The Impact of Ghosting

The last message I received from a girl I had been seeing for a couple of months was, “I hope your work doesn’t kill you lol, bye.” I can’t really fault her; my hectic work schedule and my reluctance to compromise have affected my dating life.

I completely understand her perspective. However, there are reasons for my current focus on being single and my intense dedication to building my business.

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Section 1.1: The Time Commitment of Building

Creating a successful online business usually requires a significant investment of time—typically between three to five years. I’m currently 18 months into this journey and navigating a steep learning curve. Having sold my first venture, I’m now establishing a new one-person operation while juggling a 9-to-5 job, where I also hold equity. This means that my available time is quite limited.

In essence, I am attempting to manage two businesses simultaneously. I don’t expect anyone to fully grasp my situation or what I’m doing. It has become clear to me that achieving remarkable things demands both sacrifice and compromise. One must not lament the outcomes that aren’t achieved through lack of effort.

Section 1.2: The Myth of Balance

“You’re so unbalanced.” This is a sentiment I’ve encountered from various dates in the past. But honestly, I have no desire to be balanced. The concept of balance is largely a myth. Anyone who has accomplished something significant has often done so by living an unbalanced life.

Consider elite athletes or top musicians—are there any gold medalists or chart-toppers who maintain a balanced lifestyle? Rarely. They are completely immersed in their craft, training tirelessly, competing, recovering, and then training again.

While I don’t equate myself with these greats, the underlying message remains. Although many advocate for balance, the path to achieving your goals often requires a period of unbalance. When I’m working, I embrace the unbalanced approach. When I’m resting, I also choose to be unbalanced.

Section 1.3: A Temporary Phase

Life is full of different seasons. I don’t intend to maintain this intense work ethic indefinitely. Currently, I find myself in a unique situation with few responsibilities. I’m single, child-free, and my parents are capable of caring for themselves. This creates a rare opportunity for me to go “all-in” for the next three to five years.

I have the chance to develop a range of businesses that could lead to financial freedom over the coming years. By the time I reach my early thirties, I aim to be financially independent, allowing me to enjoy life to the fullest—traveling, working on exciting projects, and collaborating with intriguing people.

Eventually, I do wish to start a family, and when that time comes, I want to be completely devoted to them. I’ll be present for my children, as work will be optional at that point.

Section 1.4: Finding Joy in the Process

I genuinely enjoy my daily routine. My schedule includes reading for one to two hours, writing for another two to three hours, working a traditional job, exercising for an hour and a half, and getting seven to eight hours of sleep. I love this structure.

It might not appeal to everyone, but I measure my life by the joy and fun I experience each day. If I’m enjoying myself, I feel unbeatable. Others might attempt to replicate my habits, but they won’t experience the same inner satisfaction that I do.

As Naval Ravikant puts it, “Escape competition through authenticity.” You can pursue anything, but not everything. While my dating life may be lacking at the moment, I’m completely fine with that.

Timing is crucial, and currently, dating isn’t part of my agenda. This realization has motivated me to clarify my goals for the next few years. Focus on your present situation rather than where you believe you should be.

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