Understanding Willpower

Willpower can be an unreliable resource. When we are well-rested, nourished, and feel secure in ourselves, we have plenty of willpower. However, we all experience fatigue and hunger. Furthermore, our sense of safety and self-worth can shift unpredictably when life doesn’t align with our expectations.

When our willpower is abundant, we believe in our capacity to follow through on our commitments. If it were always high, we might succeed, but the reality is that if lasting change depends solely on our willpower being consistently strong, we are likely to eventually abandon our resolutions.

Actions vs. Resolutions

I can relate to Twain's observations regarding New Year’s resolutions. This connection often leads me to hesitate in initiating changes. If I don’t attempt anything, I can't fail. To combat this tendency toward inaction, I focus on taking a tiny step toward change instead of making a resolution that I might not keep.

I start with my envisioned goal and then identify a very small action that will help me move closer to it. For instance, if my goal is "to meditate for twenty minutes every morning," a manageable step could be "to schedule 'meditate for two minutes' twice a week in January."

With high willpower, I act on this plan. "Meditate" will be marked on my calendar from 7:35 a.m. to 7:37 a.m. eight times throughout January, accompanied by reminders at 7:30 a.m.

While I may ignore my notifications some days, there will undoubtedly be moments when I do meditate, possibly even for longer than two minutes. Over time, I transition from merely wanting to meditate for twenty minutes daily to occasionally engaging in meditation.

At the end of January, I can reassess what, if anything, I wish to schedule for February.

Making Effort Effortless

Initiating change can be challenging, even when the benefits are clear. For example, I enjoy walking and appreciate the feeling it gives me, yet I often struggle to motivate myself to step outside. Similarly, I find it hard to write, despite enjoying the process and the sharing of my work.

I tend to resist effort, but I value the outcomes that arise from it. Perhaps my spirit animal is a sloth.

To facilitate change, I require structures. For instance, if I only practiced yoga at home, I likely wouldn't maintain a regular routine. Therefore, several times a week, I change into my workout clothes, drive to a yoga studio, and let the session unfold.

Positive behavioral changes create a rewarding feedback loop; they feel good, which motivates me to continue. Thus, I keep things simple.

My primary barrier to change is the initial effort required. I strive to make that first step as easy as possible. Simply placing an item on my calendar, without the pressure of needing to follow through, requires minimal effort and allows me to overcome my greatest hurdle—I have begun.

Making small alterations to my environment is also straightforward. For example, I store my gym shorts next to my underwear to remind myself to exercise.

If you often find yourself making New Year's resolutions only to abandon them, consider starting small. And if you typically avoid making resolutions to sidestep disappointment, then skip the resolution altogether. Instead, take action.

What is a small, manageable step you can take to inch closer to your desired behavioral change?

You might even choose to act on that tiny step right now; you never know where it may lead.

If you're interested in more insights, feel free to check out my newsletter, Not So Random Thoughts, or consider ordering my book, Where Are You? A Beginner's Guide to Advanced Spirituality, or follow me on Medium.

This video, "Why I Don't Make New Year's Resolutions - And What I Do Instead!" discusses alternative approaches to setting goals and emphasizes actionable steps rather than traditional resolutions.

The video, "Why I Don't Make New Year's Resolutions," explores the reasons behind avoiding resolutions and offers practical strategies for personal growth.