Chapter 1: The Road to Self-Discovery

Recently, I found myself in an engaging discussion with Derek Morgan while we were driving back from Chester, having just dropped our daughter off at university. Instead of enjoying coffee, we delved into a conversation about writing on Medium and the topics he might explore. Derek noted how, as we navigate through life, our emotional states can shift dramatically—sometimes even moment to moment. This brings up the question: how can one maintain focus on a subject when thoughts are constantly changing?

Reading numerous articles on Medium can be overwhelming, particularly when time is limited. Derek spends a significant amount of time reading and often becomes emotionally invested in what he encounters. His reactions can create quite a scene; at times, it feels like I should just hit the ‘read it to me’ button to ease the emotional tension. However, this emotional engagement is beneficial. Many articles spark feelings within us, allowing emotions we may have buried to resurface, providing an opportunity for us to process and ultimately release them.

I tend not to react strongly to articles; rather, my responses are more situational. I usually compartmentalize my feelings, allowing myself to vent when necessary, but when I next encounter the person involved, I gauge their demeanor towards me. This doesn’t imply that I’ve forgotten; rather, I strive not to let issues consume my daily thoughts. I don't procrastinate much unless something triggers a particular emotion to bubble up again. In those moments, I might seem to be holding onto something, but it’s more about being present in that instant.

I likened my experiences to the act of driving.

For those familiar with my earlier writings, you know that driving for me feels like a high-stakes venture. My car has a tendency to stall unexpectedly, even at high speeds while overtaking a lorry in the rain. A simple flick of the key to restart the engine usually gets me back on course, albeit with a warning light illuminating my dashboard.

Over the past few months, I’ve grown more attuned to my vehicle's quirks. I’ve learned to adapt my driving habits, realizing how tense I had become behind the wheel. I discovered that carrying too much weight in the back causes my car to stall, so I make it a point to travel light. I also avoid using cruise control, which triggers more stalling, and I’ve developed a knack for managing the accelerator and clutch to keep things running smoothly.

These adjustments have made my driving experience more seamless. We function as a team, but one small miscalculation on my part can put my life back in jeopardy.

Isn’t it curious, though, that I have to adapt? Shouldn’t life be more straightforward? Why should I limit myself due to my car's unpredictable behavior? Why can’t I enjoy a journey with friends or family without needing to constantly monitor the fuel gauge?

In our quest for a peaceful existence, we often modify our lives to avoid turbulence. But is this truly the life we desire? Are we genuinely at ease, or are we just convincing ourselves that we’ve adjusted?

Like many others, I’m biding my time for the right moment to upgrade my vehicle. I keep this ambition hidden from my current car, as I wouldn’t want to provoke it into breaking down completely. After all, if my unreliable car fails, I won’t be able to get to work and earn the money needed to replace it.

The first video titled "Time to LET GO of the THINGS that YOU CAN'T CONTROL" discusses the importance of releasing control over aspects of life that cause stress and anxiety.

The second video, "Letting Go. (How to Let Go of Bad Baggage and Good Things Whose Time Has Come)," offers insights on how to move forward from emotional burdens and embrace change.